Day 2 May 21, 2008

1. That dream kept me pretty pacified all day. I’m now allowing myself to live in La-La Land and believe that he and I will work things out within a few weeks. I know, I know. However, what’s the real harm in a little self deception if it helps get through this, right?

 

2. Work was bearable at best. No one knows except for the person who took my shift on Tuesday night and Manager M who I am close with. We’ve played it off as me not feeling well, being sick… we’re claiming I have a tape worm. HAHA. Gross but funny. So, no one asked me about it which was good. I did get asked how he was but I just said “fine” and moved the conversation along. I really do need a new job (as an attorney) ASAP.

 

3. I got out of work relatively early and I texted Unofficial. This is what it said “I hate getting out of work early and not having the option to see you now…” He responded “Ditto.” Can’t he just get the fuck over this shit? Ugh.

 

4. Manager M and I were discussing what ailment we should pretend I have. She said pregnancy. I told her that was not allowed seeing as half our staff would be too happy with it because they would know I don’t want that in my life right now. It would be like them seeing me fall from grace, if you will. I refuse to give them such satisfaction. Tape worm it is.

 

5. I miss him.

I Had A Dream… May 21, 2008

And it was about Unofficial and I. Obviously. There was something to do with being at his parents’ house (I’d never seen it). We were fooling around outside somewhere. He made a comment about me taking off Wednesday nights from now on. I said “why would I take off Wed. nights for you when we’re not even dating?!” and he looked at me annoyed and said “You’re not listening to me. This isn’t about you.” (words he said the other night) Then we got caught fooling around. But it was very PG-13. Then I found these pillows in the garage his mom had been looking for. I brought them to her. Then I’m in a room with his Mom and older sister and his sister and I were painting our nails. She said “That color is going to look great on you.” And I said “Thanks. I love this color. I have a ton of random OPI colors at home too.”

 

END DREAM.

 

I basically just woke up so I ran to the computer to type this out. I know it’ll sound strange but it made me feel a little better.

 

I am dreading going into work today. I do not want to answer questions. I don’t want to make small talk. I want people to leave me alone. Guess I’ll let you know how it went later. Let’s just hope that he at least told his parents what happened and they don’t unknowingly come into the restaurant. I would be done.