What Would Be Said At Your Funeral? November 29, 2007
I am an avid fan of General Hospital. Today was the funeral for “Emily Quartermaine.” Her best friend stood up and gave the eulogy and said some amazing things about her. It got me to thinking about who would speak at mine, and what would be said.
It’s morbid, I know… however I’ve been fascinated/scared about so many things surrounding death. There are times that I start thinking about death and I freak out. You know how you have that little voice in your head… well your inner monologue… the thoughts you have inwardly… right? Ok, well I get concerned about what happens to those when I die. Silly? Sure. But those are the things that freak me out. I will seriously start hyperventilating, crying… everything. It’s bad.
What happens though? And what would people say about me. I think that it’s something to be considered. How would I want people to remember me? Do I live the way I’d like people to be talking about when I die?
I try to change the way I live every so often. In my attempts I will go to the gym more, try and swear less, play with Simon more often etc etc. Many times, things don’t catch on and I revert. I go through periods of time when I won’t drink a lot. Then I go back and drink all the time. When I start thinking about what people will say when I die, I wonder if I should change the way I live. Like, maybe I’m not really living life in a good manner. I don’t know… if this makes sense to anyone I’ll be surprised.
So… what would be said about you at your funeral? Does it make you think of changing the way you live?
More TMI Tuesday November 27, 2007
Here’s my TMI Tuesday answers – questions provided by
1. Are you a member of the mile high club? NO
2. What is the most public place you have ever had sex? A BATHROOM IN THIS SMALL BAR… HAHA
3. What is your most embarrassing family moment? FAMILY MOMENT? I HAVE NO IDEA.
4. What kind of birth control do you use? PILL AND CONDOMS
5. Have you ever had sex in the snow? Rain? NEITHER ALTHOUGH RAIN SOUNDS HOT
Bonus (as in optional):Describe your flirting technique: innuendo, telling a dirty joke, talking about sex life, or physical contact? I TEND TO GO WITH THE INNUENDO AND A TAD BIT OF PHYSICAL CONTACT
TMI Tuesday Again… November 20, 2007
1. what’s the sexiest gesture a woman can make? I like to think it’s when I am sitting, extend my leg and fix my shoe… weird, I know
2. what are 3 inevitable things about you? Inevitable things? I’m not sure I know what that means, but I’ll give it a try… Lateness, my hunger fits (I’m like a child, if I get hungry, I get evil… it’s not fun), work-aholic.
3. what do you want . . . . now?AT… which is REALLY bad!
4. what asset do you have besides the physical and the material?work ethic and my snarkyness!
5. describe a sexy mind.sexy mind? one that can intrigue me with even the dullest of stories, someone who shows their love and appreciation for the things in their life, one that creates a drive and motivation to get to a goal…
Bonus (as in optional):What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving? I am thankful for my amazing support system and those who have helped me in the past few months/years.
Rantings…. November 19, 2007
And now, for some rantings…
If’ I’m at the gym working out with headphones on… do not come up and talk to me or try to hit on me.
I was watching Sex and the City and it was the “you can’t change a man” episode. I realized two things: 1) I am Miranda in so many ways. In this episode she gets annoyed with Steve’s cuddling… ummm… sound familiar? haha. 2) Carrie and Big remind me of AT and I. Being back in his life and nothing changing. UGH. I still haven’t talked to him… and we’re at 2 months of silence now. Thoughts of him haunt me on an occasional basis… ugh.
One thing that disgusted me today: Man bites 22-month old’s lip off How amazingly disturbing is this?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!?!??!
Ok… I think that’s it for now.
Wait.
I lied
Has anyone been reading Mike Cherico’s blog on Glamour? Let’s just talk about how much of a mess this guy quite obviously is. Not only is he the most fake blogger ever… he’s not truthful and honest with his readers…. he makes stories up… I could go on… Anyway… he is the worst person for Glamour to have blogging. I mean, they’re a women’s magazine and they have this shit head of a person writing about dating women. I understand that he might be confused or whatever… but he’s just horrible about some of these women. I’m very anti Mr. Cherico’s need for drama and lack of forthrightness. What do you think?
I Had My First Exam Dream November 19, 2007
So I am separating posts because I’ve been getting picked up (and by “I’ve,” I mean “my blog”) by tag surfers and there’s no need for them to read about everything in my life right now. So… I’m separating the posts. Deal with it.
Last night I had my first exam dream. Now, I’m sure you’re thinking “You mean to say that you didn’t have any dreams about the bar before you took it in July?!” Correct. I did not have any such dreams. Strange, I know. Last night, I had it though. I was in the same room as the real exam. But for some reason, we had to have our applications with us. And, they had us go through them to make sure they were complete and THEN we were to take the test. However, I still didn’t have my recommending attorney signature. This is the only thing I am missing on my application currently in real life, as well. I just haven’t gone down to the Cape to have Annie sign the paperwork. Well, in my dream, we needed all of that stuff NOW or else we couldn’t take the exam.
I felt the anxiety build up and myself start to freak out as I realized I didn’t have this done. I remember thinking about leaving, driving to the cape and having her sign it and then returning to take the test. However, the rules clearly stated that you couldn’t leave the exam and return. SO I was screwed.
Then, I was going through the deadlines in my head and it didn’t make sense to me. I awoke to thoughts racing… had I missed a deadline? When WAS the deadline? AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
Apparently the stress has begun a tad early… and here I thought I was dealing with it oh so well….
Got My First Comment! November 15, 2007
WAHOO! Haha… Bdawg, keep your head up! I’ve decided not to really allow this “failure” to affect me. I cried for about 2 hours, and I’ve had my moments since finding out, but I’ve been keeping busy with work and even joking about it now. Ex: If I do something stupid at work “I’m obviously not so bright… as we know since I couldn’t even pass the bar… hahahha.”
I’ve also gotten myself back in the swing of studying… kind of. I do a few hours here or there of going through the PMBR outlines slowly and methodically. I highlight some important things, I write notes of those highlights, and then I make flashcards. I also copy the PMBR “MIGS” from the 6-day book. I do one of the MIGS for each topic (like battery for example), I take the smaller topic from the big MIG and copy it on one sheet of paper, enlarging the MIG. I’m not sure if this makes sense… but I hope so.
There reason I’m only doing a few hours here and there is twofold – 1) I work a lot; 2) I don’t want to wear myself out before the real hard studying begins. I’m trying to build a great base.
I know that finding out you failed a bar exam is hard. The best way I’ve found to deal with it is get a little mad/annoyed with yourself. Take it as a fact, because it is, that you failed… and then move on. Dwelling, wallowing, etc will not help in the next round. Look at the scores you got on the MBE and make that the first thing you try to conquer. Get your essay answers back. You will not see any markings from the BBE on there, but maybe you know an attorney who can sit with you and go through your answers? Do that closer to January though. Get through the MBE stuff first. Build that foundation and then tackle the state stuff.
Just keep chugging ahead and you’ll be ok! At least that’s what I tell myself…
TMI Tuesday November 14, 2007
Got this from TMI Tuesday… Of course, the answers are mine.
1. Have you ever met a fellow blogger in person?
There were a few people I met through an old blog I had. I don’t know any bloggers from here.
2. Did you ever play an innocent game of “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours”? How old where you? I honestly don’t think I ever did. I was a good kid.
3. When did you get your first not so innocent kiss? I was 14. His name was Mike. I was in high school. It was a the beginning of a lot of stupid drama… haha
3a.If your partners are no longer of the opposite sex, when did you get that first kiss? I am still straight.
4. Have you ever awoke with someone who’s name you did not remember? HA! once my freshman year… although we didn’t have sex, I just passed out there. I didn’t even know where I was in regards to my dorm and he had to point the way. HAHA. I forgot about that story…
5. Have you ever let someone else wash you while you were perfectly capable of doing it yourself? ummm… I think once… there was this whole romantic tub experience… although it was slightly odd at the same time…
Bonus (as in optional): What makes a great first date for you? I am a big fan of dinners… then something else fun… either a bar for a bit … or bowling. Bowling is always a fun date. Creativity and the ability to just have a great time are key.
well, that was my first TMI Tuesday… hope you got to get to know me a tad better!
One more thing… November 13, 2007
I sometimes get caught up on here surfing around and reading other blogs. That tag surfer thing is pretty cool too. I entered a few new terms today and came up with some great blogs.
I’m not sure where she got it, but Fit Mommy had the best quote as the title for her latest post: “Anyone can give up, it’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength.”
not gonna lie… I feel a tad inspired…
